>>20918If you're not practicing what you know you're a shit wizard regardless of your chosen field of magic.
You jealous of people who use their power for their own success?
Use your power to help others. This makes you feel accomplished and puts you on the moral high ground, not to mention the good karma you'll accumulate.
In regards to your jealousy you should already know that it's a negative aspect of a character and should be eliminated in order to achieve elemental equilibrium.
In other words apply yourself.
>>20950During my experimentation with my energy levels I've found that my power or loosh seems to grow faster and faster as the moon cycles approach full moon.
The build up of energy got so bad I masturbated to release some of it. Having not fapped for the past month it was quite enjoyable, sending me into literal euphoria.
The following night I was experimenting with magic and in a certain ritual I have activated my energy body to cause a state that completely overshadowed my orgasm to a point where I cried of happiness due to the sensation of power flowing through me.
You have to experience it to believe it but trust me on this, no sensation caused on this physical realm can even come close to what magic can do to you.