I want to ask you wizards about something, I'm just a neophyte and need an advice from people further on the path.
I sometimes hear voices when I'm trying to fall asleep. Mostly at times when I am really tired. It happens like 2-3 times a month, sometimes more often.
I don't know if "hearing voices" would be the most correct term. It's not like the voices have a real presence in physical world, I hear them only with my mind. I lay in my bed, try to remove any thought from my mind, but at the times of my "hearing voices" I cannot do it completely. I feel like I'm just observing some crazy monologue. Mostly it's totally gibberish, some loose sentences connecting randomly with one another, going nowhere.
Sometimes I hear it with some unknown male or female voices, sometimes it's quite vivid reproduction of my friends and family voices, but the words are different. It's like my friend for example had a night-time job as a lector, reading some bullshit in my mind. At other times I cannot picture any particular "voice", I just get an impression of who is speaking.
It's not really troublesome. These voices aren't offensive, and even if they were I am really detached from all of this, it's only a slight inconvenience when I try to fall asleep fast. The only problem is, when I do hear them I cannot clear my mind completely, I cannot go into trance, meditate or anything (apart from vipassana). It's like I was targeted with some white noise ray or something, preventing the peace of mind.
Situation from the last night:
>I was lying in bed when the voices just came up in my mind
>Was a bit pissed by it, because I tried to cut them off and failed
>Tried to visualize a protective sphere or some shit like that but I lacked focus
>Tried to get into deep meditative state, like a void or something, with moderate success, voices stopped for a moment, but I didn't last there very long
>Heard my father crying in fear and some beast-like noises (it sounded like he was tormented by a beast) like a wild dog or something
>Tried to protect him by visualizing protective sphere around him (I want to add that I didn't really "see" anything, I just did everything by hearing)
>I was kicked out of this whole voices thing, and had a strange sensation at my heart chakra - warm and buzzing feeling, like a surge of energy
Before I started any attempts to control it, I just listened for several minutes to this gibberish talk. I remember some words: "My cat smells nice, I love my cat". I heard it with a feeling of a little child talking.
Usually when this sort of things happen I am in a state of half dreaming. I don't get any visuals, just a stream of words.
Wtf is that?
>inb4 fedora posters take your meds schizo