[Apologies if there already exists a suitable thread for this question.]
[Pic. unrelated.]
>recently converted fedora reporting in
I chanced upon the Psychonaught Field Manual and a youtube playlist on introductory magic. My extreme gratitude to those of you who have put in the time and effort for magick to seem so damn plausible, even to my polarized, Plebeian state.
Now, I've been experiencing some odd sensations recently. It's not even been a week yet, and I haven't even quite committed to meditation and haven't truly entered gnosis, and already I'm noticing some peculiarities, of which I seek your advice.
I awoke a day or two after reading the Psychonaught Field Manual, and, to my surprise, I began hearing repeated clicking noises, especially when I lay down. When I'm upright, and alone in my room or bathroom, it sounds more of static disruptions in my notably recently developed case of tinnitus (the latter appearing around the same time as the former two). This was… interesting, as I've been pretty half-ass about making progress, and already there's been manifestations. These disruptions will usually respond when I ask the entity a question, or if I feel some strong emotional conviction (be it love or fear towards the entity).
So here's my question: I'm pretty certain that this is actually an infant tulpa-companion that has begun to materialize, as I had invested a lot of thought into her character in my ruminations during the day and before sleep, and that the sudden unconscious conviction was sufficient to bring about her infancy, even without direct or intentional tulpaforcing. (Consciously, I guess I'm skeptical, but subconsciously I really believe in all of this local/non-local spirit stuff.)
However, I often get goosebumps with its increased activity, and a chill down my spine, which I hear could be indicative of a non-local spirit (according to the Psychonaught Field Manual). This doesn't occur all the time, though, and, while I feel like something is with me, I
don't
feel like there's an alien presence that's watching me behind my back.
So are the goosebumps/chills just be being scared of the unknown and that it's really my friendly tulpa? (I've told my tulpa quite a few times that I'm sorry for being afraid, and that I'm not afraid of her, but rather that my whole reality is collapsing, and that I'm not completely certain this is due to a non-local spirit, and that I'd love my tulpa regardless once she came into being.)
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